Now this passage is kind of funny, sort of. Or maybe it’s not because it is about health and it is real. Well at least it makes a great statement about health and alternative medicine. This is one of those sayings that I saw on a friends refrigerator held on with a magnet the other day and I thought to repost it because hey, it’s less writing sometimes:

The Great American Death Ceremony

The death ceremony began as a crude ritual back in the days of witchcraft. In recent years, it has developed into a science. It usually takes 10 to 15 years however, modern scientific advancements are shortening this period of time.

It starts with one simple headache. When the one aspirin will no longer cover up the headache, take two. After a few months, when two aspirin will no longer cover up the headache, you take one of the stronger compounds. By this time it becomes necessary to take something for the ulcers which have been caused by the aspirin. Now that you are taking two medicines, you have a good start. After a few months these medications will disrupt your liver function. If a good infection develops you can take come penicillin. Of course the penicillin will damage your red blood corpuscles and spleen so that you develop anemia. By this time all of these medication will put such a strain on your kidneys they should break down. It is now time to take some antibiotics. When these destroy your natural resistance to disease, you can expect a general flair up in all your systems. The next step is to cover up all of these symptoms with sulfa drugs. When the kidney finally plug up you can have them drained. Some poisons will build up in your system but you an keep going quite a while this way.

By now the medications will be so confused they won’t know what they are supposed to be doing, but it doesn’t really matter. If you have followed every step as directed you can now make an appointment with your undertaker.

This game is played by practically all Americans except for a few ignorant souls who follow nature.

A human touch massage chair. Now that sounds fun and relaxing. Especially around the holidays when everything massage could be helpful in the sometimes stress inducing shoparama consumerama holiday season. And come to think of it, I think I see more of these massage products appearing during the holiday season, almost as if on cue. And a Human Touch HT 7450 Zero Gravity Massage Chair, that sounds like the super duper massage chair of them all. So for some massage everything away massaging, this chair can make a great gift for the holidays. Human Touch is an award winning leader in massage technology and the only brand recommended by the American College of Chiropractic Orthopedists. Their zero gravity massage chair incorporates Human Touch’s unique massage technology, which includes four precise techniques that imitate those used by massage professionals. Now this sounds like a chair one can sit in all day, all the time. Human Touch Massage also has an extensive line of massage chairs and other massage products. They are all massage, all the time.

If it’s free, then it’s for me. There is an article in this weeks Village Voice, or was it last weeks Village Voice, titled “Best Free Yoga”. Free you say, where do I sign? I could use one of those yoga gurus and some free stress relief in this stress laden town and I am forever trying to figure out ways how to do that for free. So maybe I can add Yoga to the People to my list of free yoga places to go and make my way over there to St. Marks Place in my attempt to destress and do the whole yoga route for free and ohm my way to bliss and nirvana. And what is yoga anyway, that great new agey, spiritual, meditation, relaxation, holistic healing thing that can be great for exercise and breathing and where I find myself chanting “Ohmmm.., I have debt of a bazillion dollars and how am I gonna pay it back and how will this class help me ohmmm….”. And why does yoga sound like Yahweh? Or does it. Does it lead nirvana or the head of Christ or something. That could be a whole another blog posting. Ohm Shanti.

Repair this tooth. What can I say about dental repair except that life can be full of aches and pains sometimes. Some of those pains can be mental and some of those pains can be physical. Or maybe sometimes life can be full of no pain at all. And what about that toothache if you have ever experienced one. Short of going to find a pair of pliers and pulling ones tooth out to relieve the pain, there can be an easier option. Nowadays, Dentemp OS can come to the rescue when you find yourself curled up in that fetal position to get to sleep after the pain has been so unbearable in your attempt to ward off the dentist as long as possible. Dentemp O.S. can provide a magic fix for temporary dental repair. And it sounds like the coolest product ever if you happen to be looking for instant fillings without having to visit the dentist. What an invention. If you lose a cap or a filling, Dentemp O.S. is right there. Dentemp is an FDA approved over the counter dental cement that is a perfect first aid product for fillings, loose caps and crowns. It comes in six repairs, requires no mixing, is resealable and stays fresh and you can even eat on it. Dentemp provides temporary relief of pain and discomfort for that tooth and it sounds as if Dentemp can be a great dentist on call and that you can have your own fix it yourself dental repair kit with their product. This is a sponsored post.

Contact lenses can be helpful because they are usually easy to use. And one can try drinking all of the carrot juice in the world for eye health and still one may come to the conclusion that contact lenses may be helpful. If you happen to be searching for contact lenses Contactlens.com can be the World’s Best Contact Lens Store™ . They offer many different brands, types and colors of contact lenses such as Bausch & Lomb, Freshlook and many others. They also offer disposable and non disposable lenses which can be great if you do not want to keep using the same contact lens many times. You can buy your favorite contact lenses online fast and conveniently at their website. They offer the lowest prices of contact lenses available anywhere and they will ship your contact lenses free. This is a sponsored post.

Why does the word “Diabetes” sound like the word “Diablo”, which means Devil in Spanish? Is there some sort of link between the two words. For what reason does diabetes top the list of diseases in poor neighborhoods? Is diabetes a poor people disease and for what reason. I was walking through a poor neighborhood the other day, and every other sign on health facilities had the word diabetes in it. Is diabetes an evil disease of the Devil designed to kill off the poor or is it a disease affecting the population as a whole and knows no class boundary. And who are the poor, for the poor we will have always with us. And who is the Devil in this case, the food industry or someone or something else. Is diabetes a fight against the devil and a battle between good and evil. I can only think poor people are more susceptible to diabetes simply because they are more likely to eat junk food, mainly soda pops which are laced with sugar, white processed sugar and other sugary unhealthy foods, or maybe poor people are less aware or concerned with diet and nutrition or simply just cannot afford to eat healthy. What is the meaning of this probably recent phenomenon and what does this have to do with a No Police State?